Monday, January 4, 2016

January again?

Yay for a New Year!  I'm looking forward to 2016...I think it will be an exciting year.  I don't like the blahs of January and February though.  These dreary months of Winter always brings back a sad mixture of emotions for our family.  I will always treasure this picture from our wedding in 2009.  In hind sight, life was pretty easy back then and Dan and I hadn't really been through much at all.


Our family has grown so much since our wedding but we have experienced loss too.  Kate and Jeremy have had two more girls (Abi and Lily), Kevin and Laura have a miracle little boy Kaleb but heaven gained Kaden in January of 2010 and precious baby Savannah in February of 2015.  Dan and I have had two little girls since then too.  Our family has so much to be grateful for.  It's not that I'm trying to bring myself down, it's just hard not to think about Kaden and Savannah this time of year.  

Dan called me a few minutes ago.  He was driving the excavator across the field which is a rather monotonous task and was bored, so I guess his best option was to call his wife and chat.  We were talking about this year and what it would bring.  He made the comment, "I guess God knows what he is doing and prepares us along the way for what's to come"  It's reassuring to have a God fearing husband with good insight!  It's hard after some of the things our family has been through, to see why God does what he does.  It is painful, lots of tears have been shed, lots of why us?  And after dealing with my gluten/dairy issue and feeling sick for so long, I honestly feel a bit sorry for myself a few days and wonder "why me?"  (I know I will get better over time, it's just human nature to want immediate results)  

I guess it's ok to wonder why.  But it's also important to remember that everything in life that happens to us (good and bad) is preparing us for the future.  God doesn't make mistakes.  

Just some deep thoughts on this dreary January morning. ~ Lydia

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